You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
