all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
3pm strippers are depressing
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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