Me too!
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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