Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize
