He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
