I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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