When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Terrible idea I love it
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Randomize
