you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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