He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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