dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
