Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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