Well apparently he's into motor boating.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Randomize
