Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
