How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Randomize
