This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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