it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
The Olympian is in my bed
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
