Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
