Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
