Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
