hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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