dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
