He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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