Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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