That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
