No awkward lesbian experiences without me
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize