I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
The struggles of a small town man whore
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
