We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
it was like having sex with a tree stump
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Randomize
