I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Randomize
