haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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