nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Randomize