The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
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