Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Alive.
So much puke
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
