And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize