You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
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