my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
