shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize