I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
vagina is talking i cant
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Randomize
