you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
