he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
