then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
