i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
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