Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize
