Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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