he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Randomize
