Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize