I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
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