all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
