It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
