Dual....:-)
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
