Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
