i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
